Star Crossed Anime

Don’t Hurt Me, My Healer!

Short Synopsis: Fast talking bear, dark (skinned) elf, and idiot hero conspire to waste 20 minutes of your time!

Wooper: “My Healer” isn’t worth watching in a vacuum, but viewed as a satire of bargain bin fantasy anime, it’s vaguely amusing. You know that type of series where the main character’s face is permanently obscured so viewers can more easily imagine themselves in his place? Well, this show takes that practice to such absurd lengths that it ends up functioning as a commentary on its stupidity. There are a plethora of blatant animation shortcuts which give off the same vibe, including this shot of the main character’s helmet suddenly tripling in size to indicate his frustration. Unfortunately, these winks at the audience are My Healer’s only source of value (that I could spot, anyway). Both the elf and the bear’s personality quirks make for silly dialogue that’s likely to have you reaching for your phone out of boredom, and the faceless frontman doesn’t have a humorous word to say all episode. Even if you hate modern fantasy anime more than anything and want to see a show take jabs at it, there are better options than “My Healer.”
Potential: 5%

Amun: “So bad it’s good” – the goal of “Don’t Hurt Me, My Healer!” production committee. I’m guessing the main writer interned at Gintama and learned all of the wrong lessons. I hate all these characters. I hate the dialogue. I hate the premise. I hate everything. Well, except maybe the bear – she’s a bit funny. Nothing really happened this episode except to contrive a reason this is a show at all. There’s some dark-elf face going on here too – is that still allowed? I can’t keep up. I have stubbed my toe to greater joy than watching this show. I bet Lenlo loves it (not really though – if you watch this, it’s not my fault). ^_^
Potential: 0%

Ascendance of a Bookworm 3

Short Synopsis: Small reincarnated girl tries to make books but ends up navigating complicated political matters instead.

Amun: One of the best qualities of “Bookworm” is consistency. The oddest isekai’s tale of a young girl’s struggle to make books has stayed remarkably on message for the three seasons – Main has overcome her obstacles, both political and physical, on her Gutenberg quest, while new foes rise to complicate matters. I think the largest looming subplot is the faintest hint of a love triangle emerging with her young friend Lutz and the head priest – poor kid never had a chance. This season is opening with winter and some kind of ritual (which seems a bit ominous) – plus there’s always the chance of Main freaking out and killing everyone. Which would be very entertaining, come to think of it. Our new enemy of the season is the Ink Guild – I think there’s a huge missed opportunity for their logo to be an octopus. Every sequel has some sentiment of “I expect it to be like the previous seasons”, but with “Bookworm”, I’d say you can fully count on it.
Potential: 90%

Komi Can’t Communicate Part 2

Short Synopsis: Komi-san makes some more friends.

Mario: The first season of Komi-san started strong but eventually lost its steam for me and went out not with a bang but a whimper, to the point that I considered not picking up the second season. Well, this premiere blew my socks off again with adept direction and well-timed gags. The three skits they have for this episode are diverse, and introduce new characters / reinforce the old cast in a fun and playful mode. That new “punk” character is a fitting addition to the cast. At its core, Komi-san is about the need for communication for those who are socially-awkward, so he parallels much of what Komi-san has gone through. All the jokes land at just the right moments. While I feel that airing this season puts this show at a disadvantage because of the comparison to Kaguya-sama (and I prefer the latter much better myself), Komi-san is still a must-watch show this season.
Potential: 50%

Paripi Koumei

Short Synopsis: A Chinese military tactician is reborn in modern day Japan, where he decides to become a pop singer’s agent.

Wooper: Anime has tackled China’s military epic “Romance of the Three Kingdoms” a handful of times, but never has it dropped one of its primary generals into the 21st century… until now. I was planning to skip this show, but we got a comment urging us to check it out, and it ended up being pretty fun! It’s a fish out of water story, a template that often feels tired because the contrast between its pond and its ocean (so to speak) is over-exaggerated. But when the fish is a 300 IQ military strategist and the ocean is 1800 years removed from the pond, you’ve got yourself a winning premise. Zhuge Liang (here referred to by his courtesy name Kongming) has an enormous intellect, which he uses to rapidly absorb both the broader realities and technological minutiae of modern Japan. He also has a genuine love for music and develops a strong distaste for EDM upon first listen, making him a thoroughly based individual. There’s a careful comedic hand at work behind his character, balancing his cluelessness (“And what, pray tell, is the blockchain?”) and brilliance in equal measure, allowing him to carry the entire show with ease. I’m less happy with him hitching his wagon to a wannabe pop star, since that’s the sort of tripe that can easily kill a TV show – if we start leaning away from Kongming and towards some “big dreams in the big city” bullshit I’ll bail, but for now I’m in.
Potential: 50%

SPY x FAMILY

Short Synopsis: Super-Spy needs a kid for a mission, so he grabs one from the orphanage. He accidentally grabs a psychic one.

Lenlo: From what I remember of my time reading the manga, the start to Spy X Family was the most off-putting part. From two eccentric lead characters and their relationship to an equally absurd overarching mission, Spy X Family had a lot to establish in the first episode. And for the most part? I think it succeeded. As hamfisted as Twilight’s backstory is, it’s enough justification for this wholesome relationship to keep going. Especially when combined with that deep buried desire for a family. And as for Anya’s uwu voice? It was a tad grating at times, but she both thinks and acts like the 5 year old child she is, so it’s far more fitting than last season’s Frederica. Add on to that some successful gags like hide and seek when he was leaving or Anya’s obsession with spies and this becomes a fun, wholesome series with enough going on that it’s more engaging than the rest of the Slice of Life style shows out there. So I’m definitely going to be watching more.
Potential: 70%

Amun: Man, I was super scared when Lenlo was hyped about Spy x Family – plus we’re even both previewing it. And of course, our writers’ polarity curse has struck again! This episode…was a huge disappointment. What kind of pretentious, implausible lead is this? And Esper girl is really annoying and bratty. I get that it’s supposed to be funny, and I came into this really, really wanting to like it – but this premiere fell flat for me. At least it looks great (although I’m pretty sure I’ve seen that street in Titan). I guess this is what you get when you put Wit and Cloverworks together – cutesy, heart-string tugs with a few fight scenes thrown in (but I really liked the aerosolized flour shots). I think my issue here is the balance of comedy, cuteness,and thriller – this episode doesn’t nail it. Do I think it’ll get better? I sure hope so – I think the addition of the “wife” will probably help. Right now, this is my disappointment of the season so far. I’ll probably watch all of it.
Potential: 50%

Ao Ashi

Short Synopsis: A talented but loud kid gets scouted by a mysterious coach and spends the night together on the beach.

Mario: Soccer anime is not a rarity, but it’s also damn hard to get it right. Part of the issue is that soccer anime, like any sports anime, is more suitable in a long-running format. The current trend of this industry is limited to 1 or 2 cours, and as a result these sport shows get bogged down in the beginning phrase before they can truly take flight. The other issue is that it is difficult to animate soccer right. I have watched a few of them and without a proper budget, they just look terrible. I’m not totally convinced that Ao Ashi can get past these two concerns – its animated soccer match doesn’t look polished. I am glad, however, that it focuses on the core characters first and foremost: giving them proper time for the chemistry to sink in, giving the characters a plausible goal before expanding its cast. The main character’s antics can be loud and annoying at times (and yes, it pokes fun at itself as well. Look at the screencap), but when paired with this coach, they actually strengthen each other so far. I also approve of the way the show sets its sights on the world stage rather than the national level like other shows tend to do. All in all, like Lenlo says below, “This is a standard sports show that does everything competently.”
Potential: 40%

Lenlo: I dunno what else to say but that Ao Ashi is a sports show. Like the quintessential sports show. Yeah, the CGI players in the opening half are jank af, and yeah the soccer isn’t the most exciting part. But… I just kinda like sports shows? Ao Ashi isn’t trying to be anything special. It’s not trying to be a drama like 2.43 was, nor is it trying to one-up Haikyuu. It just wants to be a decent time for people who like action-y sports series. And in that I think it succeeds. There really isn’t much to say about it beyond, “This is a standard sports show that does everything competently.”
Potential: 50%

Love After World Domination

Short Synopsis: Romeo and Juliet with Red Power Ranger Boy and Pants-less Skull Girl.

Amun: (I bet Lenlo HATES this one). And in fairness…the character designs are wildly uneven. It’s so weird! It’s like half of the animators know how to draw the main girl’s face and half don’t….and they work on different scenes. The Power Rangers (I don’t care what their real name is – G5 or something stupid) are well animated…so why aren’t your main leads?! That’s going to really bother me if they don’t figure that out. As I’ve said before, I feel very generous towards this kind of premise (until it invariably gets beaten to death in a few seasons), but “Love After World Domination” is paper thin in pretty much every area but butt animation (and even that’s really uneven!) Like seriously, where are your pants? Right now, the animation is so uneven, I can’t make a determination – but I’ve rarely seen these issues improve over a season. Fix that, and I’m fully onboard.
Potential: 25-50%

Lenlo: I feel personally attacked to have my opinion assumed in this way… But you aren’t totally wrong. Like Amun said LAWD, as I like to call it, is a really inconsistent show. Sometimes it’s a competent Super Sentai action piece, other times it’s a mediocre rom-com. And in both cases I find the leading ladies outfit to be absurd and designed for the soul purpose of ass and tit shots. Stepping back for a moment, it’s a cute enough premise. More clever than most of the jokey junk food that usually fills out the season. So for that I want to give it credit. But… It’s still jokey junk food, the kind of thing that simply isn’t worth my time. I’d rather be catching up on older shows, checking out some western TV, or reading books and planning for my World of Darkness game than rotting my teeth with stuff like this. If it’s the feel good genre you are in for, this might be worth your time? If you want something with a more serious bite to it though, this will be a hard pass.
Potential: 10%

Kaguya-sama: Love is War -Ultra Romantic-

Short Synopsis: Four nutcases and one airhead procrastinate in their student council duties by turning mundane situations into major crises.

Lenlo: You already know by now what this is. Or whether or not you like Kaguya-sama. The only real question here is if Season 3 maintains the same level of quality as the last two. And to that I can confidently say: Yes, it does. This first episode felt just like any other episode in the series. It was fun, with a number of clever gags and premises that got me chuckling as the layers to each got peeled away. I vastly prefer this kind of layered comedy to anime’s more general slapstick, so it’s nice to see it back. Supporting this, Shinichi Omata continues with his fantastically clever and inventive direction. He brings so much to the series, so many visual queues like the camel that simply didn’t exist in the manga. Augmenting it for our personal silver screens. My enjoyment of this series isn’t in question, I know for a fact I’m going to have fun here. The only question in my mind is whether or not this will top season 2, should they have improved their drama abilities, or if it will be about the same quality as before.
Potential: 80%

Wooper: That opening montage was a heck of a reintroduction to the world of Shuchiin Academy. Even if some of its explosive pink imagery was recycled from season 2’s finale, its appearance sent a clear message: we know you remember these characters, and we know you’ve been waiting for their return. They’re especially welcome sights after watching a barren winter give way to a bleak (thus far) spring season – Kaguya-sama’s reliability is something anime could use more of, so I’m happy it’s back. We’re already making new discoveries about the student council members, such as Iino’s weakness for sexually-tinged motivational mp3s and Kaguya’s archery-honed hand strength, and this premiere puts them to good comedic use. We even got a Hayasaka appearance in the season’s first outing (overseeing Kaguya’s tentative first steps into the world of smartphone literacy). What else could you want from this show? Other than an arm wrestling story that doesn’t conclude with a girl’s victory resulting in her humiliation, I mean. Kaguya ought to be a little cooler under peer pressure than she was a year ago – at least enough to brush off the teasing of the chumps she just beat. That nitpick aside, I enjoyed the whole episode (but I hope something else can outperform it before these first impressions are through).
Potential: 75%

The Dawn of the Witch

Short Synopsis: Three mages get to know one another while carrying out an escort mission for a royal academy.

Mario: Damnit, up until I finished this episode, I hadn’t realized that it is a spin-off of Grimoire of Zero, a show I did watch back in 2017 but have since forgotten about. I did enjoy the mismatched duo of Zero and the beastfallen Youhei in the original series, but the fantasy setting is unfortunately so generic that I didn’t make any connection between this show and Grimoire of Zero (and no, Albus’s name didn’t ring a bell). Structure-wise, this first episode is clean enough to establish the quest to come and some minor conflicts along the way. The team is rescuing their fellow classmate Kudd at the moment and I can see him joining the group real soon. The interactions between the cast is just about enough… but unfortunately the dialogue drags a bit for me here. I suppose the titular witch is the worst offender for this, as she tends to act like a 6-year-old kid and the show has a tendency to amp up her tantrums, and her old-school way of talking. The main dude doesn’t fare any better, as he has as much energy as a koala sleeping in a tree (Koalas spend 90% of their time sleeping by the way). As far as “adventure” goes I can see it appeals to the target audience – it has the fun of adventure, peppered with the cast of diverse characters and a hint of political / racial tension, but otherwise if you want something deeper or more adventurous (in terms of style and storytelling), you can look elsewhere.
Potential: 30%

Wooper: Another fantasy anime destined for the digital landfill, this time set in the Kingdom of Wenias (heh). Honestly, my brain was mostly glazed over during this episode, but I still picked up on the perverted storyboarding – I’m sure you can imagine what that means, so I won’t go into any more detail. I also remember that the headmaster of Wenias’ Academy of Magic (for there must always be a magic academy) was named Albus, but instead of a bearded man with twinkling eyes peering over half-moon spectacles, she was a boring blonde lady with big boobs – give me old and wise over hot and uninteresting any day. As for the main character, he was the wettest of blankets (your classic anime underachiever with nothing in the way of personality), so his traveling companions’ attempts to get him talking resulted in some pretty dull conversation. That’s the one thing I can give Dawn of the Witch credit for, though – it tries its hardest to establish both context and character through conversation, rather than putting a narrator in our ear and calling it a day. Whether it succeeds in its goal is up to the individual to decide; personally, I found it mind-numbing, but I’ve also seen at least a dozen versions of this setting and/or premise that were far worse.
Potential: 10%

Tiger & Bunny 2

Short Synopsis: An array of sellout superheroes gang up on criminals to look good for the camera.

Wooper: I should have known better than to look forward to the second season of a show whose first season I couldn’t finish. Tiger and Bunny are as uncoordinated and childish as ever, making the prospect of watching them in 2022 even less appealing than it was in 2011. They’re left in the dust by all of the other heroes when responding to a robbery during this episode’s protracted intro sequence, and they resort to the silent treatment after one of them takes the other’s energy drink from the break room fridge. Those “other heroes” are no better – amalgamations of stereotypes and stock character traits, one and all. The show doesn’t seem to have a point of view regarding its corporate sponsorship gimmick, which is one of the most frustrating things about it. Midway through the episode, Tiger and Bunny are forced to go golfing with one of their company’s richest benefactors, who’s thrilled to be in the presence of two manufactured superstars, and their response is one of mild inconvenience. Very few of the heroes (if any) are frustrated by the attachment of a points-based ranking system to their work, as though they have no real opinions about the superhero business. To top it all off, the post-ED scene that teases this season’s villainous duo sends them whizzing past camp and straight into the loony bin. If you’re a T&B fan, bon appétit – seriously, clean your plate so I don’t have to eat the leftovers.
Potential: Not my thing

Mario: I have fond memories of the original Tiger & Bunny. While it’s nowhere near my favorite series of that year (2011 was still one of the great years in anime), I found the very idea of superheroes incorporated with reality shows and business to be fun, and a good way to satirize the consumerism of today’s world. This first episode more than satisfies that idea, introducing a new “normal” as the superhero teams are now functioning as pairs, or “buddies” to use the show’s term. It’s great to see the old gang back with some fresh new faces, and so far they are a delight. I also feel that the way they set up a new status quo is well-done, because as the before and after-credits suggest, things will get far out of control later on. I might have preferred if they stayed in this light mode of characters’ nonsensical bickering and reality-show satire rather than the over-the-top, exploding action-drama later on, but all I can say for now is that I feel right at home watching these characters again.
Potential: 50% – or “Feels right at home”